HOW TO DEFEND YOURSELF: CANE - FISTS - DIRTY TRICKS by [translated] M. P. Lynch [Lynch [translated] M. P.]

Author:[translated] M. P. Lynch [Lynch, [translated] M. P.]
Language: eng
Format: azw3, epub
Published: 2018-12-15T00:00:00+00:00

A FIRE IN THE HOME

This is no time to lose your head. There is almost always time to escape a fire and even to save a few things considered indispensable. When I was young I had the occasion to observe the demeanor of various people on the day of a fire. A fire broke out in the building next to ours (I was ten). I vividly recall our Italian neighbor who, so soon as the panic broke out, threw herself down our stairway in the dark, took a tumble and broke her leg, in addition to other lesser injuries. She accomplished all of this in five seconds on twenty two steps, then passed out on the fifth floor landing (we were on the sixth). Then I saw another one of our neighbors, an accountant, who was very pale but calm, taking in the situation. He was wearing slippers with his long night shirt tucked into his pants and he was shivering as he held a metal case under his arm. He explained, not without legitimate pride, that he never panicked. The metal case contained the most important paperwork of his insurance policy. Everything can burn, he said, but I’m covered by my insurance policy.

It covered him insufficiently, as he had a bad cold after that. I was clad only in a nightshirt and despite the calls from my mom who was looking everywhere while blinding herself with a lamp she held too close to her eyes, I went from group to group as the cold air lifted my nightshirt in a rather shameless manner. What can I say? I was ten, curious, intrigued, amused. At that age a wild adventure like that is beyond belief, and you forget things like shame since you don’t know what that is yet.

The wife of the accountant went into their apartment, courageously abandoning the landing, and brought an old jacket out to her husband. We soon learned that the blaze was under control, it was only a contained chimney fire. The Italian lady was brought back up with her broken leg, the accountant went in with his metal box and an emerging head cold. I was spared a cold thanks to my mother’s warming me with an energetic spanking.

I tell this amusing story to draw some useful lessons from it since, in the end, this is a serious book. What would the accountant have done if the fire came to our building? Would he have received the sum agreed upon by the insurance company? One often has to fight for the money, the reason being the relatively low payments they demand of clients who often try to get triple the value of the objects lost. For good reason the companies avail themselves of an inspector and the would-be trickster always becomes the dupe. Now in the case of our accountant and his wife, they would have to replace all of their garments immediately or go around naked while they waited for their claim to come through.

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